Creative ways to ask to kiss (or be kissed by) someone even if you are shy
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Overcoming First Kiss Anxiety
You might be haunted by the thought of ruining the date or
worse, being greeted by a slap.
But remember, women understand why you’re on a date
together. They know you’re both there to explore whether or not you have an
intimate sexual connection.
So, they won’t be surprised or even angry when you go for
the kiss, even if they’re not ready. They only feel that way if you go for a
kiss, they tell you they aren’t ready, and then you ignore their boundaries.
But fear not! We’ll address respecting boundaries later in
this article.
In fact, it’s generally better to go for a kiss even if you
don’t get it. Because it shows a woman that:
You’re confident and willing to express your romantic
intentions. That is always going to be attractive to a woman.
You can respect her boundaries. This builds trust and makes
her think, “Well…maybe next time he goes for it, I’ll be ready.”
Finally, stop stressing yourself out about achieving the
perfect kiss technique.
The vibe you create on the date, your boldness to show your
intentions, and your appropriate response to her reaction all matter more than
your tongue gymnastics. Read Foreplay Done Right; Getting Her Horny & Bothered
Building Anticipation
Through Touch
If a someone is going to kiss you, they need to feel
comfortable touching you first.
When you aren’t physical at all and go for a kiss, it feels
sudden. They haven’t had time to get comfortable with your touch.
Gradual touches, even if it’s just a gentle hand on their
shoulder, get them ready for the idea that things will progress into more. It
also starts to build arousal and anticipation.
Then if they seem receptive to those touches, you can
progress with more intimate touches until naturally, you both want to kiss.
Basically, you want to heat the fire so they can’t wait for
the kiss as a culmination of powerful feelings, and not just like “Oh cool,
we’re kissing.”
So the best litmus test to tell if they are ready is them accepting your touch and especially if they touch you back.
Many people overthink this. They look for a “magic sign” –
like the skies parting and angels trumpeting “Now’s the time!”
But honestly, once you get past a little basic friendly
physical contact, you should assume they are ready to be kissed at some point.
They are not letting someone get close and touch them in a
romantic way unless they are feeling it, too.
Preparing For The Kiss
Consent is paramount when making a move on someone. For
guys, you never want to make a woman feel taken advantage of.
So guys often feel like they need to ask for permission to
go for the first kiss.
It’s not the worst idea in the world, but it’s kind of the
least hot way to go about it.
Nobody wants to feel like they’re signing a legal contract
for a first kiss. Women often tell me, “I hate it when a guy asks if he can
kiss me. It kills the spark.”
Here are two better ways to go for the kiss:
- Don’t ask, tell her you want to kiss her!
- Say something like, “I really want to kiss you right now”
or “I’m thinking about kissing you.”
Speaking what you desire shows confidence and leadership.
And it still preps her that you’re going to plant one on her. Then she can
decide if she wants to lean in and kiss you. Or if she wants to turn her head,
take a step back, or tell you she’s not ready. Read Alpha Male Style;
Assertively Sexually Satisfying Her in Bed
Otherwise…
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One big challenge people face when starting to ask for
consent is finding the balance between giving space for the other person to say
no, yet maintaining the sexiness of the situation.
In practice however, the thrill of asking for consent is fun
and creative. Do you remember your first kisses? Butterflies? The uncertainty,
hesitance and awkwardness are all cues that consent is being practiced. You’re
alive to the possibility of someone saying “no”.
*Bear in mind that inviting kissing in any of these ways
requires an appropriate context (more on that later)
“Would it be okay if I kissed you on the lips?”
“would you like me to lean closer and put my lips on your
neck?”
“Would you be willing to kiss me right now?”
“I would love to kiss you right now, if you’re into it. Are
you?”
“How comfortable would you be with kissing right now?”
Try this: Lean towards someone and offer them your cheek.
Give them eye contact while tapping your cheek.
If your partner responds to that, try tapping on other parts
of your face or body.
Write your request on a piece of paper and pass it on a
note.
Part of practicing consent is being comfortable with saying
and receiving “no” as an answer.
This can also be
challenging for people to get used to. Here are some ways to practice:
“No.”
“Nope.”
“Nah.”
“Not now, but check in with me later.”
“No thanks”
“Not now.”
“Not here, maybe somewhere private?”
“Not into it.”
“No, I’m sick”
And finally, ways to
respond to receiving a “no”.
“Thanks for being honest”
“Thanks for being so rad”
“Okay, cool!”
Read The Art of Kissing - An Illustrated Step by Step Guide Into Kissing Techniques
4. The Art of Kissing - An Illustrated Step by Step Guide Into Kissing Techniques
There is more to kissing than simply locking lips. This book will help you to master the secrets of great kissing. With specific techniques for all types of kisses, this book features:
- Overcoming first kiss shyness
- Secrets to increasing your 'kissability'
- Complete instructions on French Kissing
This guide reveals everything you need to know to master the art of kissing. If you're new to kissing, your partner will never guess it once you have the benefit of all this guide has to teach. Transform your kissing technique, pucker up with passion, and master The Art of Kissing today!